Every moment in a relationship should feel like a vacation right? I mean with the fancy dinners, movie dates, and attractions around town you make it a special event every time you see each other. Of course, you want to be your best self around that person. You want to show them an amazing time until your budget can no longer afford those niceties and you are plum tired for work the following week. No one wants to admit it but dating gets tiring, especially dating the same person. Being in a long distance relationship is like 40 first dates. You are constantly learning and relearning that person over and over again reminding them why you started this long journey. You start over as if you just met them with butterflies on meetings and the uncertain way you dressed or did your hair. It definitely takes time to get to know someone from the computer screen or meeting every other weekend.
In my relationship, we struggled. After the first year, we still inquired about favorite colors and favorite restaurants. A normal relationship would have been deeper developed because time has a lot to do with distance. Going back over bank statements and how much money was spent on our “holidays”, one would’ve sworn we took extravagant cruises and lived well above our means. Without thinking we swooned each other into believing the best of the other. The honeymoon phase which lasted others 6 months lasted twice as long for us.
It took some realization for us to understand the detriment we were putting ourselves into. Reality taunted us by offering super high highs and crazy lows. Together we were our happiest selves, nothing but laughter and love surrounded our being until the depressing days we parted. I know for me, I counted the days where I could be with my boyfriend and make memories our distance stole from us. What should’ve happened was the acknowledgment of our reality and plans to make it different. Instead of living to see him again, my days should’ve been filled with seeking my purpose so his light in my life would be an addition, not the only light I lived by.
Don’t be like me. Love them, but don’t let that be the only thing that lights your life. Seek ways to get to know your significant long-distance lover without spending a week’s earnings on outings and losing the connection you have together.
Let me know what you think.
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